Topley Pike

July 20, 2016.

TOPLEY PIKE, MONSAL TRAIL CHEE DALE, CHEE TOR, RUSHER CUTTING, OLD MOOR QUARRY AND RETURN

Distance: Seven miles.

Difficulty: Easy.

Weather: Dry and hot.

Walkers: Ron Buck, Tom Cunliffe, Lawrie Fairman, Mark Gibby, Alan Hart and George Whaites.

Apologies:  Mickey Barrett (Spanish hols), Peter Beal (narrow-boating), George Dearsley (in Turkey), Colin Davison (circumnavigating Great Britain), and Julian Ross (busy).

Leader: Fairman. Diarist: Hart.

Starting point: Lay-by near entrance to Topley Pike Quarry, Derbyshire.

Starting time: 9.54am. Finishing time: 1.25pm.

Last week’s problems when Tom was unable to find his own pub paled into insignificance this week. Cunliffe’s Clanger was followed by Fairman’s Folly when our most trusted leader led us up the garden path. Instead of directing us south to one of Britain’s prettiest village pubs, he led us north to a T-junction bereft of any hostelries within miles.

We were obliged to retrace our footsteps and drive to our planned destination, The Church Inn at Chelmorton, where once again we were able to bask in sunshine in the beer garden.

As we supped pints of excellent cask ales, the sweltering heat was a reminder of bygone days when tabloid headline-writers used their limited imaginations to create such masterpieces as “Phew ! What a Scorcher.”

The scenery was magnificent as we followed the Monsal Trail alongside the picturesque River Wye and headed eastwards. After entering Chee Dale and following the north bank of the river, we should have crossed both the Wye and the A6 to head south for Chelmorton. Instead we found the Pennine Bridleway which Lawrie confidently informed us would lead us all the way to the outskirts of the village. This would have been true if we had followed it in the opposite direction !

However, after making a bewildering series of turns reminiscent of the start of Blind Man’s Buff, Lawrie first headed west when he thought he was aiming east, and then north instead of south.

Such was our trust in his navigational powers that we never doubted him as he muttered that the subsequent signs were wrong and we trailed faithfully in Lawrie’s wake. It was only when we reached a T-junction linking Peak Dale and Buxton to our left with Wormhill, Millers Dale and Peak Forest to our right that our leader admitted: “Mea culpa.”

By now we had been walking a little under three hours, including Pietime. Our return to the cars, avoiding the earlier diversion but including a lunch stop, took about 80 minutes.

We then drove to The Church Inn at Chelmorton to enjoy pints of Marstons’ Pedigree and Thwaites cask bitter for £3-30. While there we presented the head barman with the Wednesday Wanderers’ certificate of approval for good beer, service and atmosphere.

“Hanging” Judge Cunliffe then presided over a kangaroo court at which Lawrie was arraigned for leading us astray. His previous good conduct, his age, the heat and his time spent at sea were all taken into consideration, but he was found guilty as charged. He was sentenced to make no comments as to directions at next week’s walk, where he must become a follower.

It will start at the main car park in Eyam, above the public toilets, at 10am, calling at The Bull’s Head in Foolow around 12.15pm before returning to The Miners’ Arms at Eyam around 2.20pm.

Happy wandering !